Category Archives: Prose & Poetry

Personal creative prose and poetry

☛Day of the Dragonfly☚ ∞


Many of the friends say to stay away from the internet, that it’s just not healthy, totally agree.  The reasons are simple: electricity emfs and us, environmental violations such as Madagascar (see http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2010-10-28/energizer-plans-more-talks-in-china-on-madagascar-vanadium-mine.html), patent infringements (see http://seekingalpha.com/instablog/694542-daniel-b-ravicher/1905851-vringo-settles-microsoft-patent-infringement-case), my posture, “outsourcing” wage slavery and other human rights violations (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/apple-admits-it-has-a-human-rights-problem-6898617.html), supplying the NSA with more data for their imaginary externalized panopticon of “safety” (http://rt.com/usa/agency-us-nctc-surveillance-998/), or what about the new theories coming out about technology shrinking our brains for the 20000yrs or so (http://phys.org/news/2011-02-brains-smarter.html) or that we may be stunting out senses (http://digitaljournal.com/article/326976), keeping us from the rest of the world so to double speak and well, probably much, much more…

But to assure these caring souls, practicing meditation as well as spending much time “in” nature and just watching the splendor in grateful awe are some remedies one can use to combat the multidimensional stresses the internet (and the exposed “world” at large), can, has and will cause on all that use “it”.  One of the “regular” spots is the pond next to the guest house, it’s drainage isn’t so great and it seems to be running out of water as summer nears, quickly… hoping the 1000’s of tadpoles grow up in time as they get closer and closer together.  Also here recently an egret, a blue heron, a proud family of ducks with 10 ducklings, many turtles (coy and calm), deer, bear, fox, skunk, snakes, ants and so much more that we should probably just focus on one of the living non humans here…☛Introducing the Dragonflys of the Pond☚ here is one of my favorites.

Today they are at a level beyond just “play”, the dogfights between the same “species” or kind against itself (seemingly despite the sex), the ones of mating and the cross kind dogfights, the ones legends are made of (like my Grandfather in WWII at the Battle of the Bulge (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Bodenplatte)), they are made of untouchable valor.

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There were wire thin ones with violet green eyes (depending on how they saw you), with mermaid greenish gold translucent wings a flutter n flick.  It was like a fairy orgy, they were linking up in pairs (not too bizarre), all around the edge of the pond with the male’s spiked tail into the neck of the male…’The male dragonfly will pull his abdomen froward and use his anal appendages, a pair of cerci, to clasp her by the neck (her prothorax). Once he has her tightly by the neck, he can extend his body and continue to fly with her, in tandem. This position is known as tandem linkage.’ (http://insects.about.com/od/dragonfliesanddamselflies/p/How-Dragonflies-Mate.htm)

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Well then, seems kinda violent and weird but then again…we are humans so…  this particular kind of illusionists (after “making” “their” “match”), would then lace themselves couple to couple like cursive S’s  up and down the stalks of many of just one kind of the nearly flowering water plants.  There were females of another kind, brown and flying between the reedy grasses beating and damaging their wings upon them while dipping for water, laying eggs and avoiding the predator males that dove and swooped down (faster than these eyes), when bored of the dogfights and spying an easy “catch”.  Others that kept to their own and were few and with a dark violet fur so spectacular as to make burners blush synthetic fibers.  They’re loving way on the grasses of the pond’s edge was… peaceful.. well, as far as dragonflies go anyway…

The barons of the dog/dragon fights were 3 inches or so and sporting a frosty light turquoise tops and blackish bottoms with the double black striped frosty blue wings of a tempest in heat.

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Their cross kind sparing mates were the “white tails”, and when the champion “barons” of the pond weren’t too busy proving their loyalties, skills and valor with their own kind… they would gladly dragon-dogfight duel with the “white tails”, and the “white tails” always gladly accepted the challenge.

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The white tails flew differently than most the other kinds, oh, the were faster than these eyes and pulled aeronautic gravitational feats that more than likely made “our” human variety… well, lacking.  Aside from the obvious, they were very smooth in their very own way.  Gliding to a stop and swivel with a grace superior to that of a rally car driver drifting a turn x Baryshnikov² (feats that’d make the Blue Angels cry in awe), and going faster, more fearless and fluid to boot.

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They battered and battled without regard for “oneself” or wings, in total submission and grace an awe inspiring display beyond any Olympic games.. this was real Dragonfly dice rolling in their throes of life and death, where only those of adamant valor and conviction need apply.  This was the show of shows, and it lasts until the sun drops, or, until they do… in to the pond.

Every now and then the others would show themselves and play in the fray, these were the behemoths.  They seemed mostly recluse; one would buzz the far end of the pond away from the main melee, and would tenderly engage the smaller yet more ferocious middle weight contenders.  Typically it seemed that this Goliath would parlay and pass for a much preferred lap around the pond.  So elusive these eyes could barley see the green of its head as it warped on by.  High above (like a bird) there was one of such girth that it could only be called the double barreled Dragon Master.  It danced with no one save the wind, it seemed to be doing a different sacred dance, one that all seem to do as we go towards the sun in the dusk of life.  Imagine this pond if you will, you are here at bus stop of birth aka the doorstep of death, you are here with me right now, at the pond with the dragonflies and full of awe. ∞

Photo on 2013-06-02 at 07.06

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Tell it to the Mountain ∞


mtshasttrainI used to live at the base of Mt. Shasta and sometimes out there the mountain is all you have to tell it to. I used to rarely blog, but for now, you are my mountain.  From 3/24/2010
The other morning as I sat looking at the mountain thinking of the astronomical amount of uncertainty present in my life (seemingly at all times), in hopes that it would do what the mountain normally does… make most any problem seem inconsequentially small. Instead I received a question, a question of certainty and of those that “have it”.
There are many kinds of it, like the certainty that I have that if you step on my toe it will hurt, the certainty of the 5th pregnancy test, the final report card, missing the bus, quitting your job,and the certainty that one day we will die.
But then there is this other breed of certainty, and this is where things get a little hazy at times. Like the certainty that you lived before, or that there’s a place to go when your dead, or that the sun will come up tomorrow (cause you just never know.. do you), the certainty that you’re in good hands with all state, or what about the certainty that Jesus, Buddah or Muhammed existed or the certainty that any of them had some kind of special deal going, the certainty of how the world and/or universe was/is created, the certainty of purpose, certainty and its partners justified and rightousness. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not implying what anyone should or shouldn’t be certain of, I’m just trying to admit that these are just a few of the things that I’m uncertain of, in fact proudly so.
The feeling of uncertainty smells of fear, this fear creates a need for certainty, its security, comfort and solidity. Mt. Shasta is pretty darn solid, it’s been supposed to blow for over 20 years now, its totally solid and totally uncertain and yet I look to it for peace of mind….. and I find it, in the midst of uncertainty. So, with that I make this humble plea for uncertainty, to embrace it and get to know it for yourself and realize that its perfectly fine to be certain of your uncertainty, but most of all if you are not absolutely certain of something don’t pretend be.

Define Occupy for yourself


My modern re-adaptation of Julien Benda’s essay ‘The Betrayal of the Clerks’ or ‘The Treason of the Intellectuals’ from 1927.

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Morality predicated on Politics (and “political” movements), high on lofty wings of elite entitlements, built upon foundations of fraternity that supersede it’s own sustainability (aka materialism), and any shape and style of obviously unjustifiable circumstance for violation and violence, the self proclaimed birthright of the “civilized”, with a stench of greed, power and popularity so overpoweringly foul enough to force life itself to wander blind with eyes watering through a pea soup of metaphysical low laying fog in the desolate clear cut valleys of self doubt, adorned with any manner of bling, indulgencia and illusion of hope to lead life itself unawares over the finite cliff of reality.  Solipsism at its worst, humanity in its most vile selfish state.  Welcome to TODAY™!(a very long day that’s included all of my life as well as many others).  where you (or enter your chosen corporate entity name or brand here to remain in an ethereal moral $=soylent green bubble of anonymity and unaccountability, separate from life itself (pop!)), can stand on a patronizing patriotic profit driven pedestal of scientism and intellectualism above all land & sea, people, creatures, life and creation itself and feel safe… in our shared (yes, we do share it), dystopia (that’s of course only if your eyes are open)…. Our overall ability to empathize with and understand life as a whole is reflected in our overall morality and how we synchronistically act in solidarity from a point of empathy towards the Whole World™ around(ish (some think its egg shaped and most of the “civilized” once thought it was flat, I choose to leave my options open).  I truly believe that the Occupy movement represents an event unbound by time, world-wide, a cross cultural multifaceted (but anti corporate), human re-evolution of awareness through true empathy, and for the many deemed “weak”, “uncivilized” or “insane” (see the challenges to the DSM yet?), by the violent amoral Hammer culture addicted to its self fulfilling prophecies of apocalypse (pick one), true suffering (and some for generations, e.g. N. Korea’s current defector policy of death for 3 generations), and violation of freedom and life itself.  I believe that Occupy is not just another “American”,”political” or even “economic” movement seeking its voice under the thin and presently dull veneer of politics, nationalism and laws inseminated from their very beginnings with violation and foisted like rape upon all life, but an occupation founded upon a morality infused with true action and voice, one that resonates harmonically & holistically with life itself, undeniable and without the need or even the use for defense, unlike the social (or sociopathi/omnicidal if you prefer), movement known as corporate materialism: the very malignant, metaphorical and also “very real” cancer of life itself (and if I may Chris Hedges, the “true” cancer of Occupy, the reason for it), ever wonder why ENRON’s bible was the ‘Selfish Gene’ by Richard Dawkins, the self appointed Pope of Scientism.  For me and many many others, Occupy is the scab attempting to naturally form over the many life threatening open wounds caused by the self ordained and “acceptable” sacrifices and “soft targets” (with the usual comforting companions of media as propaganda, ignorance and arrogance), of the insatiable life thirsty blood drinking “cult of success”.  Don’t pick it off the scabs just because they itch with shards of a broken corporate windows, heal the wounds for we all know there is no window big enough nor enough rocks to go around, take your brick back and build it anew, build it harmonically with Life and Nature.  No, I’m not a Nihilist,  6526 arrests around the country for 1 day of peaceful protest (violence and injury not included), is enough to make one wonder.

∞Dance of Obligation


I have over these years acquired the belief that our lives are inseparable from all of creation and all time, that our very life is a gift of these dancing forces.  Modern fringe sceince is progressively reaching this same level of conviction but is held back by the normal/accepted materialist mechanistic model from 600BC or so.Image.  Each of us, every creature, rock and moment are a unique window with a unique perspective to the dance of all creation and time.  This very window is the gift we call Life Unique, one all of us received at birth and will return at death.  Seminal in this gift is the obligation of return to the very dancing forces that offered it, life.  An obligation and responsibility to life itself, to the propagation of these unique windows in all ways, to these star-like points of light, to constellations that evolve into an ever clearer picture of what is.  Our unique deeds and perspectives combine to create art on the panes of our windows unique, this art is our gift back to the dancing forces of life.  How you give your gift uniquely, how you let others peer through this art-full window into your soul and how you peer in awe through the panes of others’ unique windows is the art of giving back, to Dance the Dance of Life.

∞℗☛EVOLUTICON Pts 1-3☚℗∞


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This is not only a “testament” to “my” “faith” but also a “confession” (no, “I” didn’t “kill” “anybody” minus the “bug” “last” night and some other “nature” “stories” (had a “really bad” “night’s” “sleep”, a lot “on” “my” “mind”)), that “I” just don’t “get it”, and maybe “I’m” not “supposed” to. “Let” “me” fill “you” “in”, “right now” a “lightning storm” rolled in out of “nowhere” and filled the “sky” with “awe” and shook the “earth” of “Nevada County” (the “gold rush” “aka” the “gun pointing” towards “NV” (just “pointing” that “out” “United” “States”)), and “in my head”.  This morning (5/4/13), it was a sunny “happy” day as “I” went to the cafe for my daily “dose” of “coffee” and the “world”, sometimes it’s not even “sweet” with “organic sugar”.  Then, “two” “older” (70ish), “gentlemen” “I” “know” quite well “got into” an “argument” resulting in one of them on the “ground” and “both” of “them” “afraid”.  “I” “still” don’t “get it”, “they” were “both” “right” and “wrong”, “both ways” “at” the “same time”, and yet “I’m” “dumbfounded”, how did “I” “get here”?  Well, if “I” “was” “debating” on writing this “whatever it is” “before” this morning, this morning’s “event” was the “straw” that “broke my camel’s back” (please don’t send “pain medication”).  Oh yeah, “before” “I” “get” “too deep”, the “quote” “thing”… well, “the way” “I” “see” “it” is that the “world” of “my” “human” “experience” still “lacks” much “definition” and that these are “words” “I” “intend” to “define” “for myself”.  Although, I really don’t want to have to keep typing these damn things in here so lets just say that all the above quoted words or phrases are now, and until further notice, to be considered quoted (not necessarily a bad thing), but I “get” the “feeling” there are a lot more to “come”, so “watch out” – weave and bob, weave and bob… in “your” “thoughts”, “dogmas” and “bodies” that is (please include the last few words, as well as: “time, gravity, consciousness, unconsciousness, ethics, sentience, master, slave, light, electricity, death, life, violence, happiness and infinity” (much more upon request), and any others that may seem “questionable” or that “you” may “find” “personally” questionable (like “Woodsmen” for example), and keep in mind I “reserve” the “right” to “quote” “things” already on the quoted “list” “at any time”.  Thanks for your time and enjoy… oh, and I do “personally” and “sincerely” want to say that I am “truly sorry” for any “unintended” “offense” “taken”, that is not my “aim”, nor do “we” “live” on a necessarily “gentle” “earth”…. and/or, I’m not sorry……
the starfish in me.

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By now, you might think I’m a little “strange”, “good”, in “fact” that would be “nice”.  You “see”, my “problems” all “started” when I “discovered” I “was” “indeed” “hanging out” on a “Fallacious” “Tree of Life”, and so, I cut that *&%$#@% SOB down, and that “lumbar” is what I’ve “used” “make” my “new” “house” that you “see” “here”.  I’d “like” to “show” you “around” if I “could”, do you have some “time”….. “curious”?  Don’t “worry”, we can always “go back” to the “Real” “Tree of Life”…. right?                

Wow, BIG day (5/6/2013), I listened to that Julian/Hedges interview, I was really hoping that we could take care of that Bush/Cheaney thing first though… and maybe we could kinda see where we go from “there”, ya “know”?  Did you happen to hear about the “secret” zombie plot to make unicorns use 3D printers to smear poop on rainbows?  Neither did I.  Oh, and supposedly on Naburu, ‘Reality Earth’ is way up high in the rankings (pass it please…yo!).  Which brings me to the ULTIMATE QUESTION……. after all, how “I” do “love” mystery and anticipation.  Remind me to tell myself about the seminal question when you get a “chance”, and if you’re beginning to think that I’m “stalling”, I’m not, timing is “everything” (shhh).  This question was posted on “God”s page and stopped the “atheist comment show” “cold” (sometimes for days), over and over again, until the Facebook “lesser gods” decided I was abusing my privilege of slinging “soulful” shit onto the atheistic fan page that is well known for slinging “religious” shit, along with such sites as ‘Religion Poisons Everything’ (uh, excuse me, but I thought that was Science’s job?), so to speak.  Well, my fun didn’t stop there as I “tiptoed” over to the Huffington Post smeared a rainbow or two, and then I “dilly dallied” over to that dignified rag ‘the New Yorker’… and laid a big shiny starfish poop on an article entitled ‘Does Science have Faith?’, which by the way side as far as Richard Dawkins is concerned “Science works Bitches!”, not bad for a 4 time Nobel/best “thinker” dude huh (my Dad had a replica of that statue I’ll have you know)?  Before you come into the “foyer” of my new pad I should let you know a couple of things about what I did before I realized I was a “starfishes” (remind me to tell myself about the starfishing someday).  “Today”, while I was “gazing” out a window, I began trying wonder what I wanted to be, before I wanted to be a “job”.  I “wandered down” into the “basement” (that light never works!), and after I bumped into a few “support beams” in the “dark” “it” came to “me” like that musty smell you smell when you opened up that box of stuff that your parent’s (I do love all 6 or 7 of mine btw), carefully packed away for you oh so “long” ago (well my box did smell (that just doesn’t sound right does it)).  I travelled deep (no pun intended), into my memories, like those glow in the dark fish at the bottom of the ocean, and found in the heavy watery depths an INTERGALACTIC SUPERHERO!  That’s what “I” wanted “be”!!… but, when I got to “college”, my superhero had somehow seemingly without my “consent” “evolved” into a Geneticist (remember those ‘find a job’ punch cards?… burn them all), and decided that it would be best to let Chemistry and Math “club” my spacehero within inches of his life and then try and drown him in Statistics class (don’t worry “silly”, “I” “dropped” “out”, too “smart” for my “own” “good”).  The “moral” of these “facts”… I don’t hate Science or Religion, but, I don’t love either or (c’mon they aren’t people people!).  Science, the self professed ‘master of the universe’ and illegitimate only bastard child of the pure and simple yet strangely powerful “human” “trait” called “curiosity”, and another ancient crusty old human trait that I’d like to call (for lack of a better term), ‘I wanna do the right thing’, (that scientists are just now finding has a half life as well as a full one), eventually neither trait wanted to “claim” the “child”.  “According” to the most recent “polls” the most “expensive” substance known to “humanity” (and scientists included), is Anti-Matter, I really don’t know what to say… I mean, I “thought”… well “never mind”, silly me, it was just a thought.  “Look alive”, here’s that question you’ve been “waiting” for (you have been “waiting”, right?)….. ‘You are in the San Francisco Bay on a drowning/sinking bus with Prophet/profit x,y, or z (of your choice), there is only one way out (time life “books” flights to Mars!), and one person “dies”, what do “you” “think” will happen?’ ~ You don’t have to answer that right away, neither has Richard.  I believe that this simple question can and will end many bloody battles of the bodies, minds and souls of everyone on this planet, kinda like ‘faith in a mustard seed’ (as my Grandma used to say), and lightly sprinkled with convictioner’s sugar (the “sweetest” stuff comes from the “soul” btw).

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     I need to get something off “my” chest.  So, how many people does it take to make a new Religion/Belief system and/or to change the current Scientifically acceptable Axiom/Paradigm of materialistic “reality”?  One is probably the answer you might be looking for, that’s the I came up with anyway.  If that’s the case then I choose to do both at the same time.  For now I’ll call it ‘Mother Earth/Father Universe & the Living Gift’ and/or ‘The Law of the Mutable Sentience of Planetary Bodies and the Universe’.  That’s about as condensed as I think I can get it.  How many Islamic environmentalists are out there, how many scientist that have public or private beliefs in the “idea of a God” and/or of “alien” “life” forms?  The idea I am about to present can negotiate all of these and more.  It can negotiate the various ideas and beliefs of “God”, “the Soul”, “Life” & “Sentience” as a possible living/expanding constant Scientific paradigm/axiom of acceptable and believable unknowns in Scientific terms as well as relieve “Religious” strife and infighting allowing of course that these “Religions/Beliefs” are indeed each a path to compassion for the beauty of this creation (points unknown and infinite), called Earth and all of “it’s” “beings” as well as “ourselves”, and to value life itself over one’s “own” and valor over violence.  You can co-opt this idea and make it your own and color it as you will.

     What would happen if the Human World adopted an Umbrella Paradigm/Belief/Scientific Axiom/Religion that allowed for healthy/holistic paradigms to flourish?  Tell you what, you could call it what ever name/phrase you want (or none at all), hell, you could even call it common sense cause what’s happening right now in many parts of one Earth (well, not noticeably here by the pond anyway), is near lunacy.  I just call it Reality.  If you’re in to politics you could call it the Ultimate “Bulworth/Mr. Smith”, and if you’re in to philosophy you could call it a double edged razor and if you were moral you might call it just.  This is my peaceful offering to you, the world and life itself and I choose to call a Revolution of the Soul, or what may also be referred to as the only bloodless revolution around, even scientific revolutions have had to wait for scientist(s) to die.  If we just allowed ourselves to care, I’m sure that we could quite a bit.  That could change some things huh?  A Religion/Belief that is also a Scientific Axiom/Paradigm that can be holistically applied to our current shared/personal realities and sufferings.  If this Religion/Universal Paradigm/Belief, let’s just call it “God” for now, is an expanding and multidimensional body of knowledge then it cannot be quantified with questions and data or written in one book, rather it is the open ended questioning itself, after all, curiosity can trump fear with or without “success” and whether one calls it scientific or natural curiosity.

     A change in Belief/Paradigm could very well be reflected in our “priorities”, I’m just trying to get mine straight by accepting a flexible and mutable Umbrella for the Scientific/Religious/Belief/Paradigm in addition to the ones that I seem to be in.  What is the greater sacrifice, agreeing on one thing or ceaselessly hitting each other with various “rocks” from various “Pillars” of Belief that just may be connected as branches of the same Tree (a Tree I call Life), and then using parts of this Tree to destroy each other and itself may not be the best choice we can make.  If you were flying a kite right now, would you say you were holding onto the kite, or that the universe was holding on to you, both, none, all of the above?  What if that kite is your idea of your Soul/Awareness, then what?  What is the unity of seemingly paradoxical paradigms but an act of faith we could call a living scientific axiom or just being “alive”, as opposed to being a Machine/Human and out of the “illusion” of control and amorality.  What would you do, keep it a secret, make some quick cash or just give it away… well, I chose the latter since it was a gift in the first place.  More is to come.

 

Carbon Moment


The carbon moment
feeding the chain
a locomotive
within our brain.

Tasteless, wordless
the plumes of steam
a vapor of soma
riding our dream.

On to Edge City
over cliffs and mountains
into the valley
of eternal fountains.

A warty green man
welcomes you with a flute
as the train slow down
to take a toot.

You feel it now
underneath understanding
that you’re actually here
and not where your standing.